Series: The next six books (What about us?)
For: The mom who loves her partner but can’t stop keeping score. | 3 min read
For: The mom who loves her partner but can’t stop keeping score.
After our first baby was born, chores became the biggest source of tension between me and my husband.
I kept score. I resented him for not doing enough. I wasn’t proud of how controlling I was becoming. And sleep deprivation and my postpartum anxiety only made every argument worse.
Here’s book #4 for new moms:
💫 What About Us by Karen Kleiman
This book felt like talking to our couples therapist.
It covers it all: chores, scary thoughts, sleep, communication, sex, and all the sources of uncomfortable conversations after baby.
It’s also practical. This book is filled with cartoons, prompts, and exercises, making it easy to read when you’re exhausted and have about 3 minutes to yourself.
Here’s what it taught me:
🌟 Build a new version of your relationship: Stop trying to get the old one back (turns out a baby changes EVERYTHING).
🌟 Reframe the conflict: It wasn’t ‘me’ vs. ‘my husband’. It was team ‘us’ vs. sleep deprivation, chores, or whatever stress we were trying to survive that day.
🌟 Say what you need: Expecting my husband to read my mind only left me frustrated and resentful.
🌟 Small moments matter: Checking in, sharing gratitude, finding small ways to reconnect go a long way when everyday feels like a marathon.
🌟 Repair after rupture: Fights happen. Talking about it after helped us understand each other better — and handle the next one with more empathy and understanding.
Our relationship isn’t perfect. But this book helped me advocate for myself, see my husband as a teammate, and get better at approaching hard convos before letting my resentment build.
As Karen says: ‘The single best thing you can do for your baby is pay close attention to your partnership.’
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Read my full blog on Postpartum Support International The Next 6 Books I’d Gift a New Mom.
Read the original post that became a top search result for ‘New Books for New Moms’ here.
Learn more about what I’m fighting for.
